We, as a church and as a creative institution, have been censored by the gov’ment. I wish that I was joking, but we have quite literally been told by the State of Washington (one official emissary) that we can no longer produce our podcast. The claim was that making the show was an inappropriate use of state owned equipment, just because we produced that show while at the undisclosed location where The Two Ricks work. Shitty. We are super poor and, therefore, can’t afford the level of equipment it would take to make the same quality of show that we created with the gov’ment equip, so we bagged it. Blame THE MAN for this horrible religious oppression!
Ever wonder if The Church of Dim believes in Heaven? Listen to this episode and you can find out (and you can discover a sure-fire method to getting a good room in a very comfortable section of Heaven!)
Today I pray to thee that Paula Deen’s new show be named “Home-cookin’ in Harlem,” a live cooking show on the street which has a studio audience of 300 African-Americans who just heard her wish to have a dinner party, and… “Well, what I would really like is a bunch of little niggers to wear long-sleeved white shirts, black shorts and black bow-ties, you know, in the Shirley Temple days, they used to tap dance around. That would be a true Southern wedding. But we can’t do that because the media would be on me about that.”
Home-Cookin’ in Harlem – coming to pay-per-view soon…
Here it is, the episode you’ve all been waiting for! It contains many content items and humorous things (I’m pretty sure. We were REALLY drunk when we recorded this, so neither of us actually remembers what we said, but I’m sure it’s very funny!)
As you know, the Church of Dim and The Two Ricks podcast have been targeted by the most heinous, spiteful, dangerous, volatile, and frightening group of haters: Christians. But not just any Christians, we are being harassed by the infamous Eastboro Baptist Church (picture below).
They hate us for our beliefs; they hate us for our unwavering faith; and they hate us because we only have 8% tithing and a kick-ass goddess, Mother Protozoa. Sure she is just a microscopic, worm-like parasite, but she has a very sweet disposition. She is also never judgmental and allows her followers to engage in unlimited debauchery.
We need your support now more than ever, so join us today.
It was inevitable! Once we started to preach the TRUE FAITH, all the falsies out there would have to rear their ugly, (I almost wrote “poopy,” but it somehow seems too strong,) heads to condemn us and try to silence our good works. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s welcome the Eastboro Baptistas to the fray!
They say The New Church of Dim has killed their sons, that they pray for our deaths, well we say, “HA!” (Because we can’t think of much else to say.) Thanks for hating us, guys! Praise Mother Protozoa!
Prayed to the Holy Amoeba today – totally forgave every sin I’ve ever committed. That’s a pretty sweet deal – no guilt, no regrets, just do whatever you want and then ask for forgiveness. No wonder that Christianity nonsense took off so quickly.
Okay, all you people out there, you can breath again! The fourth episode is now available for your listening pleasure. Just click that link above, and bask in the glow of the Church of Dim’s favorite radio show.