“CoD Newsflash” by Brother O’Brien

CoD Newsflash:

After very little thought and 2 bottles of MadDog 20/20 Kiwi-Lime, the Church of DIM is exploring the possibility of incorporating cannibalism into our faith. We are now seeking volunteers for our first potluck. Come as you are.

(No smokers or weirdos.)  Only you can make this a CoD tradition!

—Brother O’Brien

Advertisements

“CoD Fact #459” by Brother O’Brien

CoD fact #459: Did you know that only 10% of a human’s cells in one’s body are actually human? The other 90% of your cells are “bacterial, viral, or parasitic”!!

In truth, the Church of Dim doesn’t even need to convert you – you’re already owned by the Lord Protozoa! (your slave instructions will soon follow…)

—Brother O’Brien

“Don’t Lose Faith!” by Brother O’Brien (and Brother Yates)

Whenever you lose faith, remember that the mighty protozoa is always with you – particularly in your digestive tract! (this message brought to you by the Church of Dim).

—Brother O’

[ I’m getting a little teary-eyed again… —Brother Yates]